[deathscyth]

hey all i recently got back to my music writing and you know im rusty and all its been a while so this is something for my Girlfriend let me know if u think shell like it

hey there beautiful girl, what do you say
when i call you up and, tell you my day
what do you do when the tears start flowing
what do you do when im not there.
tell me this my angel from above
what do you do when im not home
what will it take to stop the pain
hey there my beautiful girl
what do i really mean to you
ill tell you now the truth beyond the lies
hey there beautiful girl what do you say

so yea that's all i have for now if you need a voice over for it message me on Skype or here and ill do one depending on the amount of people who want one

P.S. need a lot of feed back on this i need it to be perfect for the one i truly love

[Raison]

nice even thou i wont be much help

[Griffith]

awww young love in the modern world, really nice lyrics man, I cant add anything, you got it

[Jato]

Needs more Jato

[Alduin]

good, im not much help either, im not a musical person, i dont sing, at all, for fear of killing off the entire human race.

[Sakito]

Sounds pretty. Needs more words is all I can advise as a guitarist/vocalist XD

[deathscyth]

i have more words just cant pick them out but yea im aswell a band leader

[Sakito]

Make a list of words or lyrics? Get everyone's opinion?

[Jato]

Make a list of words or lyrics? Get everyone's opinion?

opinions? needs more Jato

[LumberWolf]

Make a list of words or lyrics? Get everyone's opinion?

opinions? needs more Jato

i have more words...

hey there beautiful JATO, what do you say
when i call you up and, tell you my day
what do you do when the tears start flowing
what do you do when im not there.
tell me this my JATO from above
what do you do when im not home
what will it take to stop the pain
hey there my beautiful JATOwhat do i really mean to you
ill tell you now the truth beyond the lies
hey there beautiful JATOwhat do you say

There's his Second verse there Jato. Seriously though, I like it.

[Jato]

Make a list of words or lyrics? Get everyone's opinion?

opinions? needs more Jato

i have more words...

hey there beautiful JATO, what do you say
when i call you up and, tell you my day
what do you do when the tears start flowing
what do you do when im not there.
tell me this my JATO from above
what do you do when im not home
what will it take to stop the pain
hey there my beautiful JATOwhat do i really mean to you
ill tell you now the truth beyond the lies
hey there beautiful JATOwhat do you say

There's his Second verse there Jato. Seriously though, I like it.

Ah now i can rest easy here ^^

[deathscyth]

lol thanks all and i will add more to it when i get some free time its been pretty hectic with her wanting me to go everywhere with her since the concert lol but you know im ok with it

[Gollum]

hey there beautiful JATO, what do you say
when i call you up and, tell you my day
what do you do when the tears start flowing
what do you do when im not there.
tell me this my JATO from above
what do you do when im not home
what will it take to stop the pain
hey there my beautiful JATOwhat do i really mean to you
ill tell you now the truth beyond the lies
hey there beautiful JATOwhat do you say

There's his Second verse there Jato. Seriously though, I like it.

you know im ok with it

'Nuff said.